Smoshy warrior cats
by andrew.fuss.7
Summary: Tigerstar is Anthony. Darkstripe is Ian. only the funniest smosh videos get into this. every 2 reviews a new chapter will come out.


(Darkstripe and Tigerstar watch the news)

**anchor** (in the television): This just in, Sasha has released an entire album about her newest breakup. It's titled _Tigerstar, I hate, hate, hate you,_ (tilts his head) _you suck,_ (tilts his head more) _you dirty sack of s**t go die in a fire!_. (keeps talking)

**Darkstripe**: This Tigerstar guy is so stupid. I mean who would date Sashawhen she's gonna write a breakup song about him?

**Tigerstar**: (puts his hand behind his head) Yeah uh. Whoo, (crosses his paws) this guy's an idiot.

**anchor** (in the television): Here's a preview of her first song.

**Tigerstar**: (grabs the remote) Here dude, we're just gonna watch something else.

**Darkstripe**: No! (slaps the remote out of Tigerstar's hand) You know I love me some Sasha.

**Sasha** (in the television): (sings) _He was a prince And I was his queen, Love at first sight If you know what I mean?_

**Tigerstar**: Dude, this is actually really good.

**Sasha** (in the television): _Screw you Tigerstar-ar-ar! _ _Pants always full of pee-ee-ee. You cried when your goldfish died Like a little pussy._ _Screw you Tigerstar-ar-ar_

(Darkstripe dances to the song)

**Tigerstar**: (giggles) This is dumb. (changes the channel)

**Sasha **(in the television): (sings) _I remember at the theater where we met, The first time. You ran out the movie hecka wet, The pants kind. Then you asked for a napkin to wipe it up _'_Cause you dropped some "water" on the front of your pants. _

(Darkstripe stares at Tigerstar)

**Sasha** (in the television): (sings) _Ooh, ooh ooh ooh! Everyone knew the "water" was pee. Ooh, ooh ooh ooh! Pissed yourself while watching __**Paranormal Activity**__._

**Darkstripe**: What kinda idiot pees himself during _Paranormal Activity_? I barely even cry during that movie.

(Tigerstar gets frustrated and changes the channel)

**Sasha** (in the television): (sings) _I knew you were a pussy when I saw you Dancing to my songs Dressed up in high heels and my thong With my face tattooed on your butt. Oh, no! Why the hell is it on your butt?! I, know! Woah._

(Darkstripe looks at Tigerstar's butt with the Sasha tattoo on it near the end of the song)

**Tigerstar**: (covers his butt cheek and gasps) Dude, why are we even watching this? (changes the channel)

**television narrator**: You are now watching _Cooking Time with Fanny McGee_. (plays the video)

**Fanny** (in the television): And now we finally prepare these amazing Hawaiian Bread rolls which smell delicious.

**Tigerstar**: (breathes deeply) Oh thank starclan there's no way this station could play any...

**Fanny** (in the television): What do you think Sasha?

**Sasha** (in the television): Ha, they remind me of my ex boyfriend Tigerstar and his crappy-wannabe six pack. In fact, here's my new title called _Tigerstar and His Crappy-Wannabe Six Pack_. (pulls a guitar out of her behind and sings while playing the guitar) _He thought he had perfect abs. Drew them on with a sharpie. Looked like a douche..._

(Tigerstar changes the channel)

**Sasha** (in the television): (sings while clawing a dummy that looks like Tigerstar) _Screw you Tigerstar-ar-ar!_

(Tigerstar changes the channel)

**Sasha** (in the television): (sings to metal music) _CRIED WHEN YOUR GOLDFISH DIED LIKE..._

(Tigerstar changes the channel)

**Sasha** (in the television): (sings while playing the guitar) _I'd catch him stealing superhero costumes from all the little kids._

(Tigerstar changes the channel)

**Sasha** (in the television): _your naked body._

(Tigerstar changes the channel)

**Sasha** (in the television): (plays the reggae while singing a Jamaican song) _Screw you Tigerstar-ar-ar!_

(Tigerstar changes the channel)

**Sasha** (in the television): (sings) _Wearing all my clothes and dancing to my..._

(tigerstar in the music video dances to the song while real life Tigerstar changes the channel)

**Sasha** (in the television): (sings while playing the guitar) _And cutting out the a-a-a-abs_

(Fanny lip-syncs and Tigerstar changes the channel)

**Taylor** (in the television): (sings while flushing the goldfish in the toilet) _cried when your goldfish died_

(Tigerstar in the music video complains about the goldfish while real life Tigerstar changes the channel)

**Sasha** (in the television): (sings) _nasty-y_

(Tigerstar in the music video dances to the song while real life Tigerstar changes the channel)

**Sasha** (in the television): (sings to metal music) _**** LITTLE PUSS_

(Tigerstar changes the channel)

**Sasha** (in the television): (sings) _Gave you hepatitis C._ (shows a piece of paper of how she got hepatitis C)

(Tigerstar changes the channel)

**Sasha** (in the television): (sings a Jamaican song while playing the reggae) _It's pretty much (Ay) incurable._ (keeps singing)

**Darkstripe**: Dude this is so weird! I mean these songs about this "Tigerstar" guy kinda sound like they're about you.

**Tigerstar**: Pfft, no! You know me better, I would never date Sasha; and if I did, she would be like on her knees begging for me to never leave her.

**Sasha** (in the television): (sings while playing her guitar) _And just in case Tigerstar tries to say, "It ain't so," I secretly taped our breakup on video._ (plays the video)

**Tigerstar** (in the breakup video): (begs on his knees while yelling and crying) Please don't breakup with me! I'm on my knees begging for you. Sasha, your the love of my life! Plea-(notices the camera and stops crying) Is that, is that a f***ing cam...

Tigerstar (at present time): Okay, maybe I briefly dated Sasha one time like really briefly, okay?

**Darkstripe**: Seriously, I would never date Sasha. I have a little thing called "standards".

**Tigerstar** (in the television): (sings while playing her guitar) _One last thing. Before I come to an e-e-end. I cheated on Tigerstar _ _With his amazing best friend, And the greatest bowl-cut hair, And thighs oh so meaty, And the only one for me ever._

**Tigerstar**: (sees Darkstripe kissing Sasha) What the Dark Forest?!

**Sasha**: (sings while playing her guitar) _Sorry Tigerstar-ar-ar, But you do really smell like pee-ee-ee. And I'm with Darkstripe now _'_Cause his thighs are so meaty._ (talks) And his butt cheeks are totally firmer than yours.

**Tigerstar**: Ohohoh, I love you babes.

**Sasha**: And I love you, forever and ever.

(Darkstripe giggles)

**narrator**: Two hours later...

**anchor** (in the television): Sasha has just released a new breakup album. It's called _Darkstripe is the worst boyfriend ever_ (tilts his head) _and his butt cheeks aren't even that firm after all;_ (tilts his head more) _they're kind of like a loose lump of lard._

**Darkstripe**: (cries while wiping himself with paper towels) I just miss her so freaking much. (covers his face)

**Tigertsar**: Did she really give me hepatitis C?

**Sasha** (in the kitchen): (pops out from the sink) Yep!

* * *

**anchor**: Well, I'm just gonna wait here for you to review. In the meantime, Sasha's gonna list off all the guys she's broken up with.

**Sasha**: Let's see. There's Jake, Joe, Zack, Billy, Vince, Taylor, John, Perry, Larry, Carrie, Beary, Jerry...

**anchor**: F*** it, there's way too many people to keep track off! I'm just gonna end the story right now.


End file.
